I watched Die Hard 4.0 last night, and tweeted my way through it. Here’s a quick summary of what it taught me:
- Bad guys always use Alienware laptops.
- Olyphants aren’t just found in Lord of the Rings.
- Computer monitors always fritz before a virus activates C4 explosive in a case.
- Apparently you can close any chat window on your computer, regardless of OS, by hitting ‘Del’.
- All geeks are hypoglycaemic. Or pretend to be when in trouble.
- The more Bruce Willis bleeds, the stronger he gets.
- Only Bruce Willis is allowed to shoot bad guys. Everyone else has to miss, as if they’re an Imperial Stormtrooper.
- Never chase Bruce Willis with a helicopter when he’s armed with a police squad car.
- Hackers write really informative user interfaces that describe computer progress precisely. (Obviously they’re not Linux hackers.)
- A download of 500TB of data is best accomplished watching each line of data scroll through.
- The dirtier Justin Long gets, the cuter he is.
- Don’t get into a fight with Bruce Willis if he’s packing an elevator shaft and an SUV.
- Henchmen always speak in foreign languages, even when asked questions in English.
- Fat hackers in basements always have annoying mothers.
- Timothy Olyphant is about 1000x hotter as an 1800’s sheriff than he is as a 21st century bad guy.
- Bruce Willis in a fully laden semi beats a fighter plane. Accidentally.
I love Die Hard 4.0. I feel so much more edumacated this morning.