Tag Archives: Russia

Putin: We won the upcoming 2016 elections

In response to recent reports that several major opposition parties have declared a coalition ahead of the 2016 elections to combat Putin and his cronies, Vladimir Putin has held a solemn yet powerful press conference announcing victoriously that the results of the upcoming 2016 election are in. “We are delighted to announce a landslide victory, with over 105% majority”, Putin declared while flexing… Read More »

Respect

One of the most common cries coming from Russian lawmakers (amongst others) at the moment regarding the anti-GBLTI laws enacted is the simple, seemingly innocuous statement: You must respect our laws. It’s what they’re saying to visitors, potential visitors, and critics alike. They’re wrong. Utterly wrong. Respect is not given: respect is earned. Visitors heading… Read More »

Russia announces all new events for Winter Olympics

Russia has announced some new events for the Winter Olympics in Sochi, and they’re hoping these will become a default fixture of the Olympics. “We believe these events are in the best spirit of the Olympics, and will set the world ablaze with excitement”, an un-named Russian official might be quoted as having said. Developed… Read More »

To Russia with Love

Dear Vladimir, You don’t mind if I call you Vlad, do you, Mr Putin? I hope we don’t have to be on formal terms. After all, you’re the President of an entirely different country and there’s no real formal relationship between us. And besides, Russia epitomises the process of class equality – you even had… Read More »